It was this time a year ago, that I flirted with the idea of returning to university education.
I was working in a secure, entry-level management role and I had finished high school two years prior. Aside from a short-lived four-week stint in a journalism course after graduating VCE, I was pretty adamant that I’d never go back to university to finish a degree. I felt it wasn’t for me, besides, I had a good job which I was great at and I felt like I’d reached what felt like was the peak of my professional career.
Yet, I knew that was a lie, and that I was incredibly bored and restless, I wanted to learn and educate myself further on interests I’d developed through work. Initially I thought I needed to just invest more personal energy into my job and let it consume my life, in order to make me feel as though I’d ‘made it’.
Spoiler alert: that wasn’t the answer, don’t do that, please, just don’t. Ever.
I realised that this energy was terribly misplaced, and that I’d come to the realisation that I genuinely wanted to learn more than what I was getting out of my day to day life. But, choosing to begin my university education when most of my friends were close to graduating, was daunting.
The thought that kept running through my mind was “you’ll be so old when you graduate, everyone else will be so young compared to you!”. Yes, it’s true, I am a few years older than most of the people in my course, and many of my friends are close to graduating but realistically, this has no effect whatsoever on my personal timeline. Choosing to go back to university is a big decision, it felt like there was greater pressure on my choice as I had more to sacrifice, but inevitably I was so glad I chose to do so. My fear of feeling “too old” to go to university came from a place of insecurity. I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I’d written an essay or tried to apply myself academically, so suddenly undertaking a degree was a big step.
An important thing I’ve learned is how everyone’s time at university is something that is unique and individual. While it felt like I wouldn’t be graduating until my late twenties, and most of my friends were already nearing the ends of their degrees, the fact of the matter was that their journeys were no less non-linear than mine. Some had changed degrees, others swapped majors countless times, taken semesters off, changed institutions and attempted multiple degrees but didn’t find one that clicked. There’s this idea that university will be a linear journey, but more often than not, we’re all just flailing around hoping to find a path that sticks.
That’s normal. What’s great is that whatever pathway you’re following, no one really has to care about it except you. Once I realised I had to stop being so caught up on the fact that I would be working on a different timeline of that to those around me, everything felt immensely easier.
While this is probably one of the greatest decisions I could have made for myself, it would be a lie of me to say that it’s been so simple. I obviously chose what turned out to be one of the most challenging years to completely change my life (Thanks 2020…), and it’s been an overwhelming ride. Readjusting to study routines, relearning note taking techniques, reminding myself what TEEL is and regretting not paying attention more to my teachers when they said math methods may come in handy one day.
There are days where motivation lacks, and I wish I could just go back to the 9-5 life. However, this is where it’s so important to remind yourself why you’re doing this, even if it’s 10pm at night and you’re still working on an assignment that’s due the next day. Write down lists of why you wanted to go to university, list different career outcomes you’d like to achieve from your degree, listen to podcasts from professionals you admire in the industry that inspire you. Keeping ideas of what you hope to gain from your degree at the back of your mind can really help when everything feels a bit confusing and census date starts to look like the best way out of what you’ve started.
We need to normalise that no one has any clue really what on earth they’re doing, and that everyone will eventually find something that suits them when the time is right. Let’s normalise taking time off between high school and university to discover your interests and having some time to chill out. Stop discouraging these people from going back to university by constantly reminding them that “going back to university later in life will be so much harder for you”. Going to university is hard no matter when you decide to go, everyone’s timelines don’t need to match up. Never let yourself write off any hopes you may have for yourself for the fear of being ‘too late’ to join the party, you’ll get there, and if you don’t like it that’s okay! If you love it, even better!
The point is, you gave it a go.
Education occurs every day for every person, just in different capacities. There’s no timeline for it, and it’s not exclusive for those fresh out of year 12. It’s an investment in yourself, and there’s no shame in waiting to go back to school. Remember, nobody has to care about it except you.
~Tessa Kent
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